| Shew......I need a hug or something. |
[Friday
January 6th, 2006 at
2:41pm] |
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mood |
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 discontent |
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Do you know what it's like to want to scream so load that it rattles everything around you, but can't....but feel the need to do it so it'll make you feel at least somewhat better? I personally think I'm doing a pretty damn good job of holding myself together despite some things going on in my life right now. In order for someone else to be happy, I have to be miserable, but because I love them so much, I'll do whatever they want and what it takes for that to happen. I always put everyone else before myself. Not out of obligation or anything like that but because that's just the kind of person that I am. I'd rather someone else that I love and care about be happy and have something they want or need than to go out and do or buy something for myself. And when I do actually buy something for myself....I feel like it's too much money spent....and kinda feel....well not really bad for buying myself something...but like I could have got something someone else wanted/needed instead. Which is why I hardly ever buy anything for me....I mean heck....I have like $50-60 from Christmas to spend on whatever I want.....and still haven't bought one thing. It took me til Dec. to spend the money my Gran gave me for Halloween. So yeah...I really don't know what the point of this post is, but I just felt like writing it. So back to my little window I go....to put on my "ever-so-happy" smile and act like I, along with everything else, is fine and dandy. What I'd really like to have is just simply a hug from my lil sweet boy, Elijah...but yeah that ain't gonna happen either....he can always make my day tons better....just by the lil hugs and kisses he gives me everytime I see him.....Oh well...another day.
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Get Back ♥ 5 Let It Be
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